Liberal democratic style of education. Family education: styles and types

08.04.2024

The moment when a child appears in a family is also the moment when parents begin to develop their own parenting style. Despite the fact that in nature there are no identical families, there are only 4 styles of raising children. As a rule, parents adhere to one of them unconsciously, without even suspecting that there is a classification, defining characteristics and behavior patterns. The style of behavior with children can change from year to year, for example, parents often decide to enroll in parenting courses or read several books. And yet, most often the style of family education is formed from the parents’ own understanding of how to raise children, what is good and what is bad.

In fact, the character, behavior, and sometimes even the fate of their child depends on what parenting style parents adhere to. The development of children's personality is greatly influenced by the atmosphere in which they grow up, as well as parental behavior and communication style.

What influences family parenting style?

academic performance in elementary, middle and high school;
sexual activity during and after adolescence;
the likelihood of falling into “bad company” and the risk of involvement in crime;
inclination or lack of inclination to cruelty, immoral acts;
tendency to abuse alcohol and drugs;
self-esteem, understanding of one’s own desires and preferences.

Parenting styles: distinctive features

BrainApps will tell you in detail about each parenting style in a family so that you can evaluate and analyze them, compare them, and choose the one that suits you best. If you already have children, you will be able to understand what style your parenting method belongs to, notice your own mistakes and shortcomings, and most importantly, correct them. This way you will definitely be able to provide your child with a happy childhood and at the same time raise a developed, decent, versatile personality.

Authoritarian parenting style

For parents who adhere to an authoritarian type of upbringing, the child’s interests are not in first place, but his successful, prosperous future. Based on their life experience, mom and dad independently decide what is best for the child to wear, how to speak, what to do, what to do. At the same time, the desires of the child himself are perceived as something unimportant and insignificant. Such parents have a specific goal in their heads, for example: a child who only gets A’s in school, or a child who entered a medical school and studied to become a doctor. At all costs, in their opinion, the child must achieve this goal, and it does not matter that he, for example, does not want to become a doctor at all.

Strictness and drill turn upbringing in a family into constant suppression of the child, coercion and even violence. Nothing should distract from the process of achieving great goals, so every step, word, and action of the child is controlled.

What are the consequences of authoritarian upbringing of a child in a family?

First of all, the baby’s personal space suffers. His will, desires, and personality are suppressed. A child grows up in an authoritarian atmosphere, where he does not have the right to decide even small details, for example, what kind of hairstyle his hair will be in, or which way to go home from school.

With an authoritarian style of upbringing in the family, young children almost unquestioningly obey their parents, as they are driven by fear. In adolescence, problems often arise: the authority of the parent is questioned, scandals become more frequent, the teenager strives to act contrary to adults, just to defend his own opinion. Depending on his own character, the child grows into a person who:

He has a weak position in life, does not understand what he wants, and does not know how to make decisions. It is often said about people who grew up in an authoritarian family atmosphere that they do not have their own opinion, the ability to be responsible for actions and actions. Out of habit, such people strive to please others, obey, and try their best to live up to other people's expectations.
He adopted the behavior of his parents and elevated it to the absolute level. The authoritarian style of upbringing in the family causes a desire to confront and resist, which is why an aggressive, conflictual, rude personality is formed. Such people prefer to resolve issues by force, do not respect others, and are characterized by cynical and even despotic behavior. In addition, they often experience hostility, and sometimes even hatred, towards their parents.

How to tone down an authoritative style?

learn to take into account the child’s wishes, try to understand his feelings and motives;
order and coerce less often, ask and offer more often;
explain your actions, tell why the punishment followed, why you want the child to fulfill the request and do as you wish;
give your child the opportunity to independently choose friends, clothes, music, based on their own preferences and tastes;
try to accept the fact that the child may have shortcomings, focus your attention on the advantages.

Liberal, permissive style of parenting

We can say that this type of family education is the opposite of authoritarian. In such a family, warm, friendly relations can be maintained between parents and children, but discipline is very poor. Parents who adhere to liberal family education of children are not inclined to set high expectations; the most important thing for them is the child’s happiness. Like the authoritarian style, the liberal one is not a very good extreme. Parents, in pursuit of the happiness and comfort of their child, forget about discipline and punishment. They do not establish acceptable limits of behavior and strive to do absolutely everything to ensure that the child or teenager has the opportunity to express themselves.

Another version of the liberal parenting style is when parents are not particularly interested in upbringing in general and let growth and development take its course. On the one hand, this gives the child the opportunity to develop independently, on the other hand, it creates a gap between parent and child.

What are the consequences of liberal upbringing of a child in a family?

If the authoritarian style of dealing with children causes the appearance of rude or dependent people, then the liberal one – “disliked” or too detached. The following options for personal development are possible:

An independent, self-confident person, who, however, is distinguished by some detachment. Doesn't want to think about others, doesn't really understand how to show intimacy and affection. Such people go through life alone, not wanting to support, help, take care of loved ones and just people around them.
People who are used to living outside the social framework. They believe that they can do anything; they do not have to adhere to the rules and norms of behavior. Quite often, such individuals choose criminal “professions” for themselves, and are distinguished by their irresponsibility and inability to keep their word.

How to smooth out the liberal style?

The liberal style of raising children is not optimal and does not contribute to the growth of a physically and psychologically healthy person. If the above approach to parenting is too familiar to you, here are some tips:

spend more time with your child, be interested in him, your task is to establish a trusting, warm, but not devoid of parental authority, relationship;
get involved in the child’s life, establish at least simple rules that would teach the child discipline, for example, that you need to come home no later than 9-10 pm, and before you sit down to play, you need to wash the dishes and do your homework.

Nurturing parenting style (overprotection)

This style of parenting appears in families where parents are very worried about their child. Of course, because the son or daughter is still very young, they cannot solve their problems themselves, they need to be protected, looked after, something bad might happen!

Raising children in such a family is largely based on restrictions. To prevent something from happening to the child, he is forbidden, for example, from walking outside in the evening, communicating with “unfavorable” children, and sometimes not even allowed to play sports.

In general, overprotection can manifest itself in different ways. This is also the desire, usually of mothers, to “tie” the child to themselves, not to let go, to constantly look after and control. Sometimes overprotection manifests itself in excessive concern for health. Another common form of a protective parenting style is when a child grows up, stops being a teenager, and is still treated as small and not independent.

What are the consequences of caring for a child in a family?

The style of upbringing in a family largely determines the lifestyle of all members, and therefore affects the environment in which the child grows up. Often overprotective parents try to protect their child from difficulties; sometimes these difficulties are just home and school responsibilities. Overprotection leads to the emergence of the following personalities:

A person who believes that he is better than those around him. Due to the protective type of upbringing, he is used to manipulating others, treats people with distrust and arrogance. He doesn’t like to work too much, but he is demanding of others and does not want to take other people’s opinions into account.
A dependent, dependent person who is unable to cope with difficulties and problems. Does not show initiative, is helpless, even as an adult he consults his mother or father on every issue.

How to smooth out overprotection?

If you notice a protective style of raising children, don’t blame yourself, because you were just taking care of the child and wanted what was best. However, you will have to work on your approach to raising children:

find a middle ground, even the most independent child needs parental care, but do not overdo it;
do not try to completely solve the child’s problems on your own, rather give advice and help in overcoming difficulties;
do not limit children’s communication only with their family, let them communicate more often with their peers;
In family relationships, children need discipline, but do not forget about freedom, give the child the opportunity to be independent.

Authoritative or democratic parenting style

Finally, we have come to the most successful style of family education, thanks to which harmonious, independent people who are not isolated from society grow up. Authoritative parenting is balanced, parent and child accept and understand each other. To some extent, this type of parenting is similar to the liberal one, but there is one significant difference: raising children is not left to chance, but takes place under sensitive but unobtrusive control.

An authoritative style of family education implies that the child is an independent and original person. The family communicates with children, imposes moderate disciplinary demands, provides love and support, sets expectations, but does not force them to achieve goals.

Adhering to this style of family education, parents strive to talk with children, explain requirements, discuss problems and omissions. To avoid coercion, adults give logical, reasonable arguments and defend their rightness.

What are the consequences of raising a child with authority in a family?

If a child was lucky enough to grow up in a family where an authoritative parenting style was used for children, most likely he is an independent person who knows how to make decisions and is not afraid of responsibility for his actions. He is distinguished by his ability to set goals and strive for them, is not afraid to take initiative, and builds relationships with the people around him based on respect and mutual understanding. He knows what a compromise is and how to find it, and also, having his own opinion, accepts the opinions of the people around him.

If your parenting style is democratic, we won't give you advice. You already show miracles of understanding your child, adequately assess his capabilities, and play an active, positive role in his life.

Good afternoon, dear readers!

The topic of raising a child remains one of the most pressing. Are we treating our kids right? What kind of people will they grow up to be? This largely depends on how the parents behave. Let's consider the main parenting styles in the family and their influence on the formation of the child's personality.

Research shows that the behavior of the parents determines how the baby will feel in adulthood. School performance, social activity, and even subsequent sex life are determined not only by genes and environment, but also by parenting style.

A favorable psychological climate is considered to be an environment in which all family members treat each other with respect and honor their obligations. Children in such a family respect their elders, and the elders are always ready to protect the younger ones.

In a prosperous family, all issues are resolved at the common table together. All members have sufficient self-esteem, each can develop their abilities without compromising others.

But we are not always able to achieve such a microclimate in the family. Parents also have their own fears, prejudices, and aspirations that prevent them from establishing normal relationships with their children. As a result, we get a kind of mixed type of education, where different styles intersect.

Dominance style

A family with an authoritarian upbringing regime pays more attention to traditions, demands obedience, but takes little into account the opinions of children. Parents' words are not discussed: mom and dad are always right. The child’s initiative is not encouraged, but the house is dominated by prohibitions, constant control, and physical punishment for misconduct is not uncommon.

What do these styles of raising preschoolers lead to? As a result of the dominance of dad and mom, teenagers grow up either lethargic, infantile and lack of initiative, or cruel, rebellious, but easily succumb to the influence of stronger and more self-confident comrades.

Boys in such families grow up with low self-esteem. They are not balanced, the only thing holding them back is the control of their parents. When control disappears in adulthood, such a child's behavior can turn against society.

There is an opinion that people in Hitler's Germany in that era were brought up in families in the spirit of authoritarianism, so they took unquestioning submission for granted.

Liberal

This style is also called laissez-faire. In such a family, warmth and a friendly atmosphere reign, but discipline clearly suffers. The wishes of the child are put at the forefront, the opinions of the parents are taken into account last.

The liberal style allows kids to unleash their creativity. Dad and mom take care of the child and can make him happy.

However, the trouble is that liberal-minded adults do not feel responsible for the kids and their future, so they obediently fulfill their requests and desires.

Since there is no discipline in the family, children are left to their own devices, and they get the false idea that they can control adults. When teenagers become adults, they try to manipulate other people in the same way, although they have little success.

It is this pedagogical method that produces unhappy children. They grow up depressed, weak-willed, among such teenagers there are most cases of violence, alcohol and drug abuse.

Lack of discipline prevents you from establishing control over yourself in the future at work and in the social sphere. The guys have difficulty controlling their desires and do not have far-reaching goals. They do poorly at school because their parents are not interested in their education and do not participate in discussions.

Authoritative

This style can also be called democratic, or aimed at cooperation. It is characterized by care and friendly attention in the family, emotional support and love from adults. But, despite this, parents are consistent in their demands and encourage initiative, responsibility, and determination in their children.

To explain to children some rules that must be followed, adults use reasonable arguments and evidence. They do not impose their own will; children can make their own decisions and have a choice.

As a result, both parties benefit. Parents set realistic expectations for their children, encourage academic success, are involved in the activities of their children, but at the same time, children do not show aggressiveness, have high self-esteem, and get used to achieving goals themselves.

This is perhaps one of the best parenting styles. Children raised in such families are conscious citizens, creative people, striving for their goals.

Chaotic

Abnormal parenting styles in the family are not consistent in the demands of adults. The child is not presented with specific requirements; there are disagreements between relatives about how to behave with the baby.

Since the opinions and emotional state of adults are constantly changing, kids lose their sense of stability. Mom and Dad either scold “what the world is worth” or show touching affection. As a result, the child grows up anxious, pays little attention to the demands of adults, and has poor social adaptation.

Overprotection

All previous styles of raising teenagers and children still give, at least sometimes a little, but still independence to the little ones. The caring style completely “ties” the adult to the child. As a rule, anxious mothers suffer from this “sin”. They constantly think that something bad will happen to their baby, so they try to protect him from all the negative aspects of life.

But, in essence, they are trying to live instead of the child, doing everything for him and depriving him of independence. How will this baby grow up? There can be two scenarios: passive, selfish or aggressive, trying to escape from parental care.

But the worst thing is the transmission of feelings of anxiety to offspring. Children begin to feel dependent and become infantile.

Determining the parenting style of a particular family is very difficult. Most often, there are several methods of pedagogical “work” of adults, so the result is a mixture of methods. And it’s even more difficult to analyze your situation from the outside. What if you are that “Hitler” in a skirt or a smug liberal?

The best thing is an outside perspective. If your child goes to kindergarten or school, ask educators and teachers how he behaves and how he treats others. If he tries to become a tyrant himself, it means you behave the same way at home.

If he doesn’t listen and allows caustic statements about elders, then it’s time to end liberalism. Or does his desk neighbor help him tie a bow on his hat? Then it’s time to teach him independence and reduce overprotection.

A child’s social behavior is an indicator of the parent’s parenting style. As if in a mirror, we recognize ourselves in our children.

See you soon, friends!

The development of the child within the family largely determines his entire future. This is where the basics of behavior, communication and perception of this world are laid. The child’s response to the surrounding reality also depends on the style of family education of preschoolers. It would be useful for parents to familiarize themselves with possible parenting styles and learn about their positive and negative sides. Such a thoughtful approach will help create harmonious relationships within the family.

Upbringing within the family lays the foundations for a child’s personality

Family is the initial stage in a child’s development

Boys and girls, like sponges, absorb all family methods of communication and behavior, perceive them as a model, and subsequently apply them in society. This is where the origins of problems in education come from.

As the first educators, parents have a tremendous influence on the child's mind. This gives them the right of superiority over teachers in kindergartens and schools, who also begin to apply educational techniques to children. A good family is characterized by mutual understanding between parents and children, because they have the same goals and objectives.

The formation of the child’s personality will depend on what parenting styles parents choose in the family. Parenting style refers to a number of principles, including: control, physical and sensitive contact, a way to guide the child’s behavior, influence on him, the presence of rewards, prohibitions, etc.

Domestic and foreign psychologists have studied the issue of family education styles. Each classification is based on the personal criteria of the authors, therefore there is no consensus on this issue.

The responsibility of parents for shaping the child’s personality is very great.

Classification of family education styles by J. Baldwin

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The classification of the American psychologist James Martin Baldwin was based on the following criteria: family control and requirements, emotional support and assessment methods. On this basis, he identified two parenting styles.
Democratic style
With this style of education, the level of communication in the family increases, children, including those of preschool age, actively participate in the discussion of family issues, their opinion is important and weighty, parents are always ready to help, but this does not imply a renunciation of children's independence. Parents with a democratic style of upbringing try not to limit themselves to their own perception of the child’s personality.
Controlling style
In this case, there are great limitations in the behavioral capabilities of preschool children. The child receives an intelligible and detailed explanation of the prohibitions and their meaning. This parenting style assumes that there is no disagreement within the family about the appropriateness of disciplinary action.
The psychologist conducted research on children growing up in families where various parenting styles were used, including a mixed type. J. Baldwin concluded that boys and girls who grew up in families with a democratic parenting style had the following characteristics:
good leadership ability;
positive psychological development;
high social activity;
easy contact with peers;
lack of altruism;
lack of empathy and sensitivity.

In the controlling type of parenting, the child is strongly limited by prohibitions
Using a controlling parenting style results in children:
are characterized by a higher degree of obedience;
easily suggestible;
are fearful due to excessive controlling pressure;
are not persistent in achieving goals;
are not aggressive.

The use of a mixed method of exposure affects preschoolers as follows:
easy suggestibility;
obedience;
high degree of emotional sensitivity;
lack of aggression;
low level of imagination;
unoriginality of thinking;
lack of curiosity.

Disadvantages of a mixed type of upbringing - lack of curiosity and imagination
Classification of family education styles by G. Craig
The psychologist examines the types and styles of family upbringing through the prism of two main parameters: control on the part of parents and the level of warmth in relationships. Let's consider what tactics of parental behavior the author identifies.
Authoritative style
An authoritative parenting style is based on a high level of control on the part of adults, but at the same time, the child’s desire for isolation and independence, and the presence of warm intra-family relationships are encouraged. As a result of an authoritative parenting style, we see socially adapted girls and boys who are capable of self-control, with high levels of self-esteem and self-confidence.
Authoritarian style
In an authoritarian parenting style, a large role is given to the strict fulfillment of all parental demands; relationships in such a family are cool and distant. Children are characterized by isolation, gloominess, frequent irritability and fearfulness. Girls who grew up in families with an authoritarian parenting style are characterized by passivity and dependence, while boys are characterized by aggression and uncontrollability.

In authoritarian families, children have almost no say; their task is to follow the instructions of their parents.
Liberal style
A liberal parenting style minimizes parental control and relationships are warm. The child’s behavior is hardly regulated in any way, but at the same time, warmth in communication does not lose its weight. In this family, children are more cooperative than adults. Growing up in families with a liberal parenting style, children learn to be aggressive, assertive in behavior, and overly impulsive. They are characterized by a lack of demands on themselves, but often children become very creative and active people.
Indifferent style
The author also distinguishes the indifferent style of education, in which there is no control on the part of the parents at all, as well as the relationships themselves. Adults do not engage with children and do not communicate; there are no restrictions on the indifferent type of communication. The presence of hostility towards children creates anger and a desire to behave antisocially in their young hearts. These are manifestations of an indifferent parenting style.
Classification of family education styles by D. Elder
Autocratic style implies autocracy on the part of adults. Their opinions and decisions are not discussed or explained. Control over children's behavior is weak here. Characteristic is the imposition of will and emphasizing the child’s incompetence in various areas of life.

In an autocratic family, all decisions are made exclusively by adults
Authoritarian style Parenting involves making all decisions only by parents. Boys and girls are allowed to express their opinions, but nothing more.
Democratic style education - children are given an equal place in the discussion process. Everyone has the right to vote.
Egalitarian style completely equalizes the rights and opportunities of adults and children. This method implies not only equality in terms of decision-making, but also an equal division of responsibility for this choice.
Permissive style typical for those families where adults give children a lot of freedom, while expecting them to be responsible for their own decisions.
Next comes permissive style education in which the child has complete and uncontrolled freedom. With a permissive parenting style, adults often do not follow the sequence of their own actions: for the same act, the child can be both rewarded and punished.
Under ignoring style education implies a complete lack of interest in the child’s life on the part of adults. The child's requests and needs - all this remains unattended.

The styles discussed in this chapter, aimed at raising preschool children, give us a complete picture of possible options for communication within the family from the point of view of psychology.

Ignoring parenting is the disinterest of parents in the problems and joys of the child.
Classification of family education styles by L.G. Sagotovskaya
The author divides family upbringing styles based on the following criteria: emotionality and the degree of involvement of adults in relationships with children. The classification of parenting styles has only 6 types:
passion: children are the only goal in life;
indifference to the needs, interests and demands of children;
selfishness on the part of parents: adults put unbearable burdens on boys and girls;
the child is considered as an object for education, but without taking into account his individual characteristics;
a child is an obstacle to building a career and personal life;
the child receives a number of responsibilities, but at the same time receives respect.

Styles of abnormal family education E.G. Eidemiller
The fundamental factors for dividing parenting styles are the following: the emotional presence of adults in a child’s life, the level of care and control, taking into account the age and personal abilities of the child. Let us present this classification, which presents abnormal parenting styles:
Hypoprotection – control and guardianship are at a minimum level. There are even situations of pathological neglect. Boys and girls receive little attention both spiritually and physically. Often there is hidden hypoprotection, in which control is present at a formal level, but in reality there is a complete lack of care and warmth.

Hypoprotection is characterized by minimal care for the child
Dominant hyperprotection. Excessive care is suppressed by control over the most insignificant things. There is a large number of prohibitions and restrictions. All this leads to a lack of independence, determination, and initiative in the child. It is difficult for such children to stand up for themselves (we recommend reading:).
Pandering Overprotection. With this abnormal way of communication, the child is a beacon. All desires and whims are fulfilled in the blink of an eye. As a result of an indulgent attitude, we see a child with a great desire to be a leader, but not distinguished by tenacity and perseverance.
Emotional rejection. Adults ignore the needs of children, and cases of abuse are common. The parent expresses his emotional negativity in the form of constant dissatisfaction. The child is constantly under the influence of phrases: “not like that,” “not like that,” “underdeveloped, whom anyone can beat.” Sometimes adults try to hide their emotional rejection by being overly concerned about the child, but at the same time, coldness reveals itself as a lack of sincerity. An adult finds close relationships painful and wants to get rid of them quickly.
Increased moral responsibility. The requirements placed on the child do not correspond to his age development. For example, placing on the child responsibility for the health and life of loved ones, the expectation of unconditional honesty and decency. Such inflated demands are combined with ignoring the true needs of the child and his personal interests.

A child is not always able to fulfill all the requirements placed on him by his parent.
Chaotic style
There is also another type - the chaotic style of family education. This method of communication implies inconsistency in the actions of an adult. There is no single approach to the educational issue, there are no clear requirements and responsibilities. With a chaotic style of raising a child, parents themselves cannot agree on what is right in this case and what is not.
A child with this style of upbringing does not acquire the necessary stability and regularity in the world around him. He lacks clear rules of behavior and assessment. Chaotic parental reactions rob the child of the opportunity to gain stability. Boys and girls become anxious, insecure and impulsive due to inconsistent punishments and rewards. In difficult situations, such children show aggression, uncontrollability and antisocial behavior. With this style of parenting, we end up seeing children with a lack of self-control and responsibility. Children have low self-esteem and immature judgment. The above classification of child upbringing styles reflects only the most dramatic deviations within the family circle.
Traditional typology subdivides three main ways of communication within the family. We will give parents brief recommendations on them.
Authoritarian type of communication
An authoritarian parenting style implies that the wishes of the parents are the law for the child. There are pros and cons here. As a result, the baby becomes withdrawn and close contact with adults is lost. Subsequently, such children become dependent and unsure of themselves. A small percentage of children with an authoritarian parenting style sometimes enter into “confrontation”, trying to defend their positions.

An older child may openly protest against an authoritarian parenting style.
Consider his characteristics, needs and inclinations. If you don’t want to see an insecure, withdrawn person in the future, start using our recommendations and adjusting your attitude and your influence now.
Democratic type of communication
The most harmonious style of family education is democratic. Discipline in the family is combined with children's independence. The child has a number of responsibilities, but there is no infringement of his rights. Adults respect the opinions of younger ones and take them into account when necessary. Big conflicts, as a rule, never arise in “democratic” families.
Moderation reigns in everything. Harmonious development gives birth to non-aggressive people with leadership abilities. A teenager is able to control those around him, but he himself is extremely rarely manipulated. Children from “democratic” families are sociable and easily adapt to any society. Adults respect the authoritative opinion, desires and interests of the child.

The democratic style of education presupposes almost complete equality of adults and children in the family
Friendly relationships should not overshadow parental prestige. It is necessary so that the teenager knows that he can resort to it in case of a problem and rely on you. Thus, part of the need is to use an authoritative parenting style.
Liberal type of communication
Another name is the permissive style of family education, very modern. Adults do not care at all for a child who does not have any restrictions or prohibitions.
Allowing a child to be entirely in his own power is wrong. Such liberal tactics can give rise to bad friends for a teenager who negatively influence him, so if you do not want this for your child, change your permissive way of communicating. To break the habit of liberal communication, it is important to have rules and responsibilities listed in an imaginary table that are equal for all family members. Spend more time with your child, do not allow uncontrollability to occur.

The style of education (communication) in the family is a set of private attitudes, concepts, principles, and value orientations that provide conditions for the development of the child and his preparation for social life. Basically, the predominant type of parental influence on the child is considered, but it is necessary to take into account: which family member dominates and how he dominates, as well as the significance of the influence of any family member on the child. However, it is often possible to observe disagreements between spouses in relation to the same act of the child, which are formed depending on the styles of relationship between the parents.

In psychology, it is customary to distinguish 6 main types of family parenting styles: authoritarian, permissive, democratic, chaotic, alienated and overprotective. Each of these styles has its own characteristics and has a different impact on the psyche and personal development of the child.

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Family parenting styles

With an authoritarian parenting style, parents suppress the child’s initiative, strictly guide and control his actions and actions. When raising children, they use physical punishment for the slightest offenses, coercion, shouting, prohibitions. Parents give instructions and orders without paying attention to the children's opinions and without recognizing the possibility of compromise. In such families, obedience, respect and adherence to traditions are highly valued. The rules are not discussed. It is believed that parents are always right, and disobedience is always punished, often physically. Parents limit the child’s independence, not considering it necessary to somehow justify their demands, accompanying them with strict control. Children are deprived of parental love, affection, care, and sympathy. Such parents only care that the child grows up obedient and efficient. Parents strictly monitor the completion of homework by younger schoolchildren, to the point of standing nearby and putting pressure on the child in an attempt to get him to act independently. For the purpose of self-defense, children use a variety of tricks, such as crying, to show their helplessness. As a result of such measures, children lose the desire to learn, they have difficulty concentrating during teacher explanations or when preparing lessons.

If mothers tend to implement more “permissive” behavior towards older teenagers, then authoritarian fathers firmly adhere to the chosen type of parental authority.

The fact that many people in Germany followed Hitler in the past is attributed to the fact that they were brought up under an authoritarian regime that demanded unquestioning obedience from them. Thus, the parents, as it were, “created the conditions” for Hitler.

With such upbringing, children develop only a mechanism of external control, based on feelings of guilt or fear of punishment, and as soon as the threat of punishment from the outside disappears, the teenager’s behavior can become potentially antisocial. Authoritarian relationships exclude spiritual closeness with children, so a feeling of affection rarely arises between them and their parents, which leads to suspicion, constant vigilance and even hostility towards others.

With their parents, such children may seem calm and dutiful, but as soon as the threat of punishment disappears, the child’s behavior becomes uncontrollable. Children grow up either insecure, timid, neurotic , unable to stand up for themselves or, conversely, aggressive, authoritarian, conflicting. Such children have difficulty adapting to society and the world around them.

An authoritarian parenting style makes some children weak-willed and insecure, while in others it breeds aggressiveness. The first ones make no attempt to learn to make decisions on their own and “break down” as an individual. The second category of children from families with an authoritarian parenting style acquires a large number of negative character traits with age: inability to compromise, conflict, cruelty andaggression .
Parental dictate affects children’s inability to resolve conflicts through discussion. Most often, with age, they accept only a forceful way to solve the problem.

The influence of an authoritarian parenting style on adaptation in society
Children from families with an authoritarian parenting style have low self-esteem. They cannot be the initiators of any positive activity. In addition to this, the peculiarity of spontaneous action and imbalance makes such children dangerous to society as they grow up.
The only thing that can keep a person brought up in an atmosphere of “domestic dictatorship” from committing antisocial actions is fear of punishment, but this is typical only for children and adolescents. With age, this fear goes away.

2.2 Permissive style of family education

From a very early age, parents provide their child with complete uncontrolled freedom of action. Adults in such families are very often busy with themselves and their own affairs. They care little about the child’s state of mind; they are indifferent to his needs and demands. And sometimes they simply don’t consider it necessary to pay attention to them.

Parents use punishment and reward methods inconsistently and ineptly. They can punish a child and immediately reward him. The main method of education in such a family is carrot and stick. Parents build their relationship with their child in such a way that they involuntarily cultivate in the child a search for the most beneficial forms of interaction with others, stimulating the manifestation in children of such qualities as servility, flattery, and toadying. .

With a permissive style, communication with a child is based on the principle of permissiveness and low discipline. To assert himself, the child uses whims, demands “Give me!”, “Me!”, “I want!”, and is demonstratively offended. The child does not understand the words “Must!”, “Impossible”, and does not follow the instructions and demands of adults. Parents with a permissive style of communication with a child are characterized by an inability or unwillingness to lead and guide the child.

Such parents are caring, attentive, and have close relationships with their children. They give the child the opportunity to express himself, show his abilities, discover his creativity and individuality. Parents sincerely believe that in this way they will be taught to distinguish between what is right and what is wrong. It is difficult for parents to set boundaries for the permitted, acceptable behavior of their children. They often encourage their child’s overly relaxed and inappropriate behavior.

Teachers working with such students should be aware that they have little interest in the learning process. But they are always ready to demand the best grade from teachers at any cost. Such students react poorly to criticism addressed to them, and they always have someone to blame. They do not know how to be selfless friends, it is difficult for them to get used to the children's team, because they want to be in sight all the time, and if this does not happen, they are ready to blame everyone for their problems, but not themselves. Often the parents of such children say that the child is not liked in the class, he is not allowed to express himself, and nothing interesting happens in the class. In fact, the child himself ignores and rejects the proposals of the teacher and the class, sharply criticizes everything that is done in the team, offering nothing in return.

The influence of a permissive parenting style on a child's character

Younger schoolchildren from such families do not like either mental or physical labor. During the lesson, they get tired very quickly and try to avoid work under any pretext. Often such students are dishonest about the teacher’s instructions and various responsibilities. They can exhibit self-confidence bordering on rudeness.

It is paradoxical that children from such families become the most unhappy. They are more susceptible to psychological problems such as depression and various kinds of phobias, and among them there is a high tendency to commit violence. They are also easily involved in various types of antisocial activities. Research has shown that there is a link between permissive parenting and juvenile crime, drug and alcohol abuse, and early sexual activity.
Since children have not been taught to control themselves and monitor their behavior, such children are less likely to develop a sense of self-esteem. Lack of discipline makes them want to impose some kind of supervision themselves, so they “make a lot of effort to establish control over their parents and try to get them to control themselves.”

The influence of a permissive parenting style on adaptation in society
Unmet psychological needs cause children to become “vulnerable and unable to cope with daily challenges, which prevents the child from fully participating in society.” And this, in turn, hinders their social development, the formation of self-esteem and positive self-esteem. Lacking high goals and expectations, children typically have difficulty controlling their impulses, are immature, and are unwilling to take responsibility.”
As they grow older, such teenagers conflict with those who do not indulge them, are unable to take into account the interests of other people, establish strong emotional connections, and are not ready for restrictions and responsibility. On the other hand, perceiving the lack of guidance from parents as a manifestation of indifference and emotional rejection, children feel fear and uncertainty.

2.3 Democratic parenting style

The democratic parenting style is characterized by warm relationships between parents and children, moderate disciplinary requirements and hopes for the children's future, as well as frequent communication. Democratic parents are caring and attentive, they create a loving atmosphere in the home and provide emotional support to their children. Unlike parents of the permissive style, they are firm, consistent in their demands and fair. Parents encourage personal responsibility and independence in their children in accordance with their age capabilities.
Parents create discipline using rational and problem-oriented strategies to ensure children's independence and compliance with group rules when necessary. They require children to obey certain established standards of behavior and monitor their implementation. “Family rules are democratic rather than dictatorial.” Parents use reasonable arguments, discussion and persuasion, rather than force, to achieve mutual understanding with their children. They equally listen to their children and express their requirements to them.
Children have options and are encouraged to offer their own solutions and take responsibility for their actions. As a result, such children believe in themselves and in the ability to fulfill their obligations. When parents value and respect their children's opinions, it benefits both parties.
Democratic parents set acceptable boundaries and standards of behavior for their children. They let them know that they will always help when needed. If their demands are not met, then they treat this with understanding and are more likely to forgive their children than to punish them. In general, this parenting style is characterized by mutual understanding between parents and children and mutual cooperation.

Teenagers are included in the discussion of family problems, participate in decision-making, listen to and discuss the opinions and advice of their parents. Parents demand meaningful behavior from their children and try to help them, being sensitive to their needs. At the same time, parents show firmness, care about fairness and consistent discipline, which forms correct, responsible social behavior.
Moreover, unlike other children, they are better adapted to life.

With a democratic style of education, parents encourage any initiative of the child, independence, help him, take into account his needs and requirements. They express their love and goodwill to the child, and play with him on topics that interest him. Parents allow children to take part in discussions of family problems and take their opinions into account when making decisions. And also, in turn, they demand meaningful behavior from children, they show firmness and consistency in maintaining discipline.

The child is in an active position, which gives him the experience of self-government and increases confidence in himself and his abilities. Children in such families listen to the advice of their parents, know the word “should”, know how to discipline themselves and build relationships with classmates.

Also, the democratic style of education is characterized by the presence of mutual understanding between parents and children, the manifestation of warm feelings between them, frequent communication and moderate discipline. Parents are attentive to their child, emotionally support him, and create an atmosphere of love and care in the family.

Parents encourage children's independence and personal responsibility in an age-appropriate manner. Parents set rules and standards, boundaries of acceptable behavior and require their child to comply with them.

Mutual understanding between parents and children is achieved through persuasion, discussion, compromise, and arguments. Parents always listen to their child and give the child the opportunity to take responsibility for their actions and actions.

In families with a democratic parenting style, parents encourage children'sindependence and personal responsibility. A child grows up in an atmosphere of mutual understanding and emotional support. Children know that people believe in them. Thus, they try to justify the trust of their parents and achieve better results.

The influence of a democratic parenting style on a child's character
According to research, children of democratic parents rank first in terms of self-esteem, ability to adapt to leadership and interest in the faith in God professed by their parents. They respect authority, are responsible and control their desires. These children are more confident and responsible, so they are much less likely to abuse drugs or alcohol, as well as become involved in criminal activity. They also have fewer phobias, depression and aggression.

Research also shows that such children are less susceptible to negative influence from peers and are more successful in building their relationships with them. Because a democratic parenting style strikes a balance between control and independence, it results in competent, responsible, independent, and confident children. These children are much more likely to develop high self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-respect, are less aggressive, and usually achieve greater success in life.

The key traits of their character are self-confidence, responsibility, and the ability to discuss complex issues.

The influence of a democratic parenting style on adaptation in society
Children from families with a democratic upbringing style, as a rule, study well, know how to build relationships with peers, and are not subject to negative influence from others. They are non-aggressive, aware of their goals and objectively assess opportunities, so they can achieve great success in life.

The democratic style of parenting, according to many psychologists, is the most effective style of family education.

2.4 Nurturing parenting style (overprotection)

The desire to constantly be near the child, to solve all the problems that arise for him. Parents vigilantly monitor the child’s behavior, limit his independent behavior, and worry that something might happen to him.
The underlying desire of a mother to “tie” her child to herself and not let go of her is often motivated by a feeling of anxiety and anxiety. Then the need for the constant presence of children becomes a kind of ritual that reduces the mother’s anxiety and, above all, her fear of loneliness, or more broadly, the fear of lack of recognition and deprivation of support. Therefore, anxious and especially older mothers tend to be more protective.
Another common motive for overprotection is the existence in parents of a constant feeling of fear for the child, obsessive fears for his life, health, and well-being.
It seems to them that something is bound to happen to their children, that they need to be looked after in everything, protected from dangers, most of which turn out to be the figment of their parents’ suspicious imagination.
Overprotection, caused by the fear of loneliness or unhappiness with the child, can be regarded as an obsessive need for psychological protection, primarily of the parent himself, and not the child.
Another reason for overprotection is the inertia of the parent’s attitude towards the child: an already grown-up child, to whom more serious demands must be made, continues to be treated as a small child.
Overprotection manifests itself not only in protecting the child from everything that, in the opinion of adults, can harm health; but also in ignoring the baby’s own desires, in the desire to do everything for or instead of him - to dress, feed, wash, and in fact - to live instead of him. Strict adherence to the regime, fear of deviating from the rule - all these are manifestations of excessive fears of parents, which often turn into neuroticism in both children and adults themselves.
Adults are always in a hurry. Mom has no time to wait for the baby to put on tights or fasten buttons; she is annoyed that he sits at the table for a long time and spreads porridge on the plate, pours milk on himself, and does not know how to properly wash himself and dry his hands. And not paying attention to how the child, albeit still awkwardly, but stubbornly tries to push the button into the buttonhole, persistently tries to cope with the naughty soap, removes his hands: “Let me do it myself, as it should.” The desire to do everything for the child is also manifested in the way adults play with him. The kid is trying to assemble a pyramid, but he can’t put the ring on the rod, he wants to open the box, but the lid “doesn’t listen” to him, he tries to start the machine with the key, but the key “doesn’t want” to turn in the hole. The child gets angry and runs to his mother. And a caring mother, instead of praising him for his efforts, supporting him and patiently helping him cope with difficulties together, collects, opens, turns it herself.
In essence, the desire to do everything for the child hides a lack of trust in his capabilities. Adults put off teaching independence until the future, when the baby is older: “You’ll do it yourself when you grow up.” And when he grows up, it suddenly turns out that he doesn’t know how to do anything and doesn’t want to do anything on his own. How different children of the same age in a nursery or kindergarten differ in this regard! Some open their lockers themselves, diligently and deftly pull on their jackets and boots, happily run for a walk, others sit indifferently on the banquette and wait for the teacher to dress them. Passivity, the constant expectation that adults will feed, wash, clean, and offer an interesting activity - this is a consequence of an overprotective parenting style, which forms in the child a general attitude towards life not only in the family, but also in a broader social context.

Overprotection can also turn into the other extreme. Trying to escape from the control of adults, a child can become aggressive, disobedient, and self-willed. Many complaints from parents about the negativism, stubbornness, and obstinacy of children, which most clearly manifest themselves towards the end of early childhood, during the crisis of 3 years, are due to adults’ misunderstanding of the child’s desire to grow up. At older ages, these qualities can take hold and become stable personality traits. The main unfavorable role of overprotection is the transmission of excessive anxiety to children, psychological infection with anxiety that is not characteristic of age.
In most cases, parents dominate their “children” throughout their lives, which contributes to the development of infantilism (preservation in adults of mental traits characteristic of childhood). It manifests itself in immaturity of judgment, emotional instability, instability of views. It is under the influence of this style that “mama’s boys” grow up.

With an overprotective parenting style, parents deprive the child of independence in physical, mental, and social development. They are constantly next to him, solve his problems for him, live in his place. They overly care and patronize him, fearing and worrying about his health. Even when the child becomes an adult, parents continue to take excessive care of him, constantly worrying about him, about his health and well-being.

Overprotection suppresses the initiative, will and freedom of the child, his energy and cognitive activity, deprives him of independence, fosters obedience, lack of will, and helplessness. With an overprotective parenting style, parents unconsciously inhibit the development of various skills and abilities in the child, the development of perseverance in achieving goals, and hard work.

The influence of an overprotective parenting style on a child’s character

Despite external care, the nurturing style of parenting leads, on the one hand, to an excessive exaggeration of the child’s own importance, and on the other, to the development of anxiety, helplessness, and delayed social maturity.
The child grows up helpless, infantile, unsure of himself, neurotic, anxious, and tearful. Subsequently, he has difficulties in socialization.

Some children in adolescence will strive to escape from the excessive control and guardianship of their parents, showing aggression, becoming disobedient and willful.

Constant control and restrictions can, with age, develop in a child secrecy and the ability to be cunning. During adolescence, a child may begin to consciously use lies as a means of self-defense from the endless infiltration of adults into their lives, which will ultimately lead to alienation from their parents, which is especially dangerous at this age.

A child accustomed to excessive care can become obedient and convenient for parents. However, external obedience often hides self-doubt, self-doubt, and fear of making mistakes. Overprotection suppresses the will and freedom of the child, his energy and cognitive activity, fosters obedience, lack of will and helplessness, inhibits the development of perseverance in achieving goals, hard work, and the timely formation of various skills. A survey was conducted among teenagers: do they help with housework? The majority of students in grades 4-6 answered negatively. At the same time, the children expressed dissatisfaction with the fact that their parents did not allow them to do many household chores, believing that they could not cope with them. Among students in grades 7-8 there were the same number of children who did not participate in family life, but the number of dissatisfied with such care was several times less. This survey showed how children's desire to be active and take on various responsibilities gradually fades away if adults prevent this. Subsequent reproaches against children that they are “lazy,” “unconscious,” and “selfish” turn out to be belated and largely unfair. After all, we ourselves, wishing our children well, protecting them from difficulties, cultivate these qualities in them from an early age.

The influence of an overprotective parenting style on adaptation in society
The consequence of overprotection can be the formation of dependence on others, including the negative influence of other people.

This gives rise to dependence, insolvency, infantilism, self-doubt, risk avoidance, contradictory tendencies in personality formation, and lack of timely developed communication skills.

2.5 Alienated family parenting style

With an alienated style of family upbringing, relationships imply a deep indifference of parents to the child’s personality. Parents “don’t notice” the child and are not interested in his development and spiritual inner world. By actively avoiding communication with him, they keep him at a distance from themselves. Children are left to their own devices.

In such a family, parents either “do not see” their child, or actively avoid communication with him and prefer to keep him at a distance (psychological distance). The disinterest of parents in the development and inner life of the child makes him lonely and unhappy. Subsequently, he develops an aloof attitude towards people or aggressiveness. At school, a child from such a family is unsure of himself, neurotic, and experiences difficulties in relationships with peers.

No one in the family is interested in the development or spiritual world of the child; they keep him at a distance, preferring not to communicate at all. At a younger age, he suffers terribly because of this attitude.

An alienated parenting style is observed more often in dysfunctional families where one or both parents abuse alcohol or drugs.

How will a child grow up with an alienated style of family education?

Such an indifferent attitude of parents makes the child lonely and deeply unhappy, unsure of himself. He loses the desire to communicate, and may develop aggressiveness towards people.

In the future, such a person can grow into both a wonderful loving parent who will try to give his children everything that he was deprived of in childhood, and an uncontrollable, aggressive type who dreams of taking revenge on the whole world for his own grievances.

Teenagers often get into trouble with the law.

2.6 Chaotic parenting style (inconsistent leadership)
This is the absence of a unified approach to education, when there are no clearly expressed, defined, specific requirements for the child or there are contradictions and disagreements in the choice of educational means between parents, or between parents and grandparents.
Parents, especially mothers, do not have enough endurance and self-control to implement consistent educational tactics in the family. Sharp emotional changes occur in relationships with children - from punishment, tears, swearing to touchingly affectionate manifestations, which leads to the loss of parental influence on children. Over time, the child becomes uncontrollable, disdainful of the opinions of elders and parents.
With this style of education, one of the important basic needs of the individual is frustrated - the need for stability and orderliness in the surrounding world, the presence of clear guidelines in behavior and assessments.
Frustration is a mental state caused by objectively insurmountable (or subjectively perceived) obstacles that arise on the way to achieving a goal. Manifests itself in the form of a range of emotions: anger, irritation, anxiety, guilt, etc.
The unpredictability of parental reactions deprives the child of a sense of stability and provokes increased anxiety, uncertainty, impulsiveness, and in difficult situations even aggressiveness and uncontrollability, social maladjustment.
With such upbringing, self-control and a sense of responsibility are not formed, immaturity of judgment and low self-esteem are noted.

A chaotic style arises due to disagreements between parents in the choice of means and methods of education. Conflicts in the family are becoming more and more frequent, parents constantly sort things out among themselves and often in the presence of the child, which leads to neurotic reactions in the child.

The influence of a chaotic parenting style on a child’s character
Under the influence of a chaotic parenting style, a child will neglect the opinions of his parents. As you get older, you may become uncontrollable.
Regular "shift"course » education can provoke in children increased uncertainty, impulsiveness, low self-esteem and lack of a sense of responsibility.

The influence of a chaotic parenting style on adaptation in society
Children from families with a chaotic parenting style are recognizable by their lack of self-control, anxiety and impulsivity. Under the influence of their parents, they easily change their minds and can commit contradictory actions.
Characteristic is the inability to finish what has been started. Most often this is not due to a lack of skills, but rather to an emotional state.

Neurosis, psychoneurosis, neurotic disorder (novolat. neurosis from ancient Greek νεῦρον - “nerve”) - in the clinic: a collective name for a group of functional psychogenic reversible disorders that tend to have a protracted course. The clinical picture of such disorders is characterized by asthenic, obsessive and/or hysterical manifestations, as well as a temporary decrease in mental and physical performance.

Toadying is when you have to do something for the sake of something or someone, in order to get a benefit for it.

Classification of families.

There are many different options for composition or structure, family:
- a “nuclear family” consists of a husband, wife and their children;
- “completed family” - a union increased in composition: a married couple and their children, plus parents of other generations, for example grandparents, uncles, aunts, all living together or in close proximity to each other and making up the family structure;
- a “mixed family” is a “reconstructed” family formed as a result of the marriage of divorced people. A blended family includes stepparents and stepchildren, as children from a previous marriage are merged into the new family unit;
- a “single parent family” is a household run by one parent (mother or father) due to divorce, leaving or death of a spouse, or because the marriage was never concluded (Levi D., 1993). A.I. Antonov and V.M. Medkov are distinguished by their composition:
- nuclear families, which are currently the most common and consist of parents and their children, that is, two generations. In a nuclear family there are no more than three nuclear positions (father-husband, mother-wife, son-brother or daughter-sister);
- extended families are a family uniting two or more nuclear families with a common household and consisting of three or more generations - grandparents, parents and children (grandchildren).
The authors point out that when it is necessary to emphasize the presence in a nuclear family based on a polygamous marriage, two or more wives-mothers (polygyny), or husbands-fathers (polyandry), then they speak of a composite, or complex nuclear family.
In second families (based on a second, not first marriage), together with the spouses there may be children from this marriage and the children of one of the spouses brought by him to the new family A.E. Lichko (Lichko A.E., 1979) developed the following classification of families:
1. Structural composition:
- full family (there is a mother and father);
- single-parent family (there is only a mother or father);
- distorted or deformed family (having a stepfather instead of a father or a stepmother instead of a mother).
2. Functional features:
- harmonious family;
- disharmonious family.
There are various classifications of types of distribution of roles in the family. So, according to I.V. Grebennikov, there are three types of distribution of family roles:
- centralistic (or authoritarian, with shades of patriarchy), when the head is one of the spouses, often the wife, who has supreme power in resolving the main issues of family life;
- autonomous - husband and wife distribute roles and do not interfere in the sphere of influence of the other;
- democratic - family management rests on the shoulders of both spouses approximately equally.
Types of family structures according to the criterion of power (Antonov A.I., Medkov V.M., 1996) are divided into:
- patriarchal families, where the head of the family state is the father,
- matriarchal, where the mother has the highest authority and influence, and
- egalitarian families in which there are no clearly defined family heads and where the situational distribution of power between father and mother prevails.

Authoritarian style of family education. With an authoritarian parenting style, parents suppress the child’s initiative, strictly guide and control his actions and actions. When raising children, they use physical punishment for the slightest offenses, coercion, shouting, prohibitions. Children are deprived of parental love, affection, care, and sympathy. Such parents only care that the child grows up obedient and efficient. But children grow up either insecure, timid, neurotic, unable to stand up for themselves, or, conversely, aggressive, authoritarian, and conflict-ridden. Such children have difficulty adapting to society and the surrounding world. Parents strictly monitor the completion of homework by younger schoolchildren, even to the point of standing nearby and putting pressure on the child in an attempt to get him to act independently. For the purpose of self-defense, children use a variety of tricks, such as crying, to show their helplessness. As a result of such measures, children lose the desire to learn, they have difficulty concentrating during teacher explanations or when preparing lessons.

With their parents, such children may seem calm and dutiful, but as soon as the threat of punishment disappears, the child’s behavior becomes uncontrollable.

Liberal - permissive style of family education (hypocustody). In a liberal-permissive style, communication with a child is based on the principle of permissiveness and low discipline. To assert himself, the child uses whims, demands “Give me!”, “Me!”, “I want!”, and is demonstratively offended. The child does not understand the words “Must!”, “Impossible”, and does not follow the instructions and demands of adults. Parents with a liberal-permissive style of communication with a child are characterized by an inability or unwillingness to lead and guide the child.

Liberal parents are caring, attentive, and have close relationships with their children. They give the child the opportunity to express himself, show his abilities, discover his creativity and individuality. Parents sincerely believe that in this way they will be taught to distinguish between what is right” and “wrong”. Liberal parents find it difficult to set the boundaries of the permitted, acceptable behavior of their children. They often encourage their child’s overly relaxed and inappropriate behavior.

Overprotective style of family education. With an overprotective parenting style, parents deprive the child of independence in physical, mental, and social development. They are constantly next to him, solve his problems for him, live instead of him. They overly care and patronize him, fearing and worrying about his health. Even when the child becomes an adult, parents continue to take excessive care of him, constantly worrying about him, about his health and well-being. Overprotection suppresses the initiative, will and freedom of the child, his energy and cognitive activity, deprives him of independence, fosters obedience, lack of will, and helplessness. With an overprotective parenting style, parents unconsciously inhibit the development of various skills and abilities in the child, the development of perseverance in achieving goals, and hard work.

Alienated style of family education. With an alienated style of family upbringing, relationships imply a deep indifference of parents to the child’s personality. Parents “don’t notice” the child and are not interested in his development and spiritual inner world. By actively avoiding communication with him, they keep him at a distance from themselves. Children are left to their own devices. An alienated parenting style is observed more often in dysfunctional families where one or both parents abuse alcohol or drugs.

Chaotic style of family education. Some psychologists identify a chaotic style of family education, characterized by the absence of a single consistent approach to raising a child: there are no specific, definite, clear requirements for the child. A chaotic style arises due to disagreements between parents in the choice of means and methods of education. Conflicts in the family are becoming more frequent, parents constantly sort things out among themselves and often in the presence of the child, which leads to neurotic reactions in the child. Unpredictable actions and reactions of parents deprive the child of a sense of stability, provoke increased uncertainty, impulsiveness, anxiety, aggressiveness, and uncontrollability , social maladjustment.

Democratic style of family education. With a democratic style of education, parents encourage any initiative of the child, independence, help him, take into account his needs and requirements. They express their love and goodwill to the child, and play with him on topics that interest him. Parents allow children to take part in discussions of family problems and take their opinions into account when making decisions. And also, in turn, they require meaningful behavior from children, show firmness and consistency in maintaining discipline. The child is in an active position, which gives him the experience of self-government, increases self-confidence and his abilities. Children in such families listen to the advice of their parents, know the word “should”, know how to discipline themselves and build relationships with classmates. Also, the democratic style of education is characterized by the presence of mutual understanding between parents and children, the manifestation of warm feelings between them, frequent communication and moderate discipline. Parents are attentive to their child, emotionally support him, and create an atmosphere of love and care in the family. Parents encourage children's independence and personal responsibility in an age-appropriate manner. Parents set rules and standards, boundaries of acceptable behavior and require their child to comply with them. Mutual understanding between parents and children is achieved through persuasion, discussion, compromise, and arguments. Parents always listen to their child and give the child the opportunity to take responsibility for their actions and actions.